If you've got the cash or know someone who does -- this is an incredible investment opportunity to steal a beautiful beach house at a fraction of what its worth. This 6 bedroom, 3 1/2 bathroom house is on the Jersey shore in Ventnor, NJ, one block from a beautiful, huge beach, with ocean views and is newly painted, with all new hardwood floors, a newly remodeled kitchen and master bath, and beautiful furniture/decor. Summer rental income alone exceeds $30k.
http://www.realtor.com/search/listingdetail.aspx?loc=08406&mnp=700000&mxp=750000&bd=6&sid=78393c8490244b749fb85a6e60c90390&lid=1104214090&lsn=2&srcnt=2
The house sold three years ago for $850k, is now listed for $660k and is available on a short sale basis--i.e. will likely sell for somewhere in the $500k-$600k range. Depending on the circumstances, seller assistance of up to 3% may be available.
Interested parties should contact the realtor, Mark Arbeit at 609-402-5885 or markarbeit@aol.com
Monday, December 22, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
OK I'm lame....
It's been so freezing I haven't been to the playground in forever. I know I suck but the baby is still getting fresh air - just not with me. I hate the cold, what can I say? I vow to live somewhere warm one day. Every winter I call my sister and we say "That's it - this is the last year we can live in cold weather." This has been going on for 15 years or so. From Rochester to Chicago to Bangor, ME - trust me - I have lived in severe cold and it's just not fun on any level.
So a few things on my mind. None particularly funny. Sorry - I promise to be funnier soon.
1) Perspective is my word of the month. Keeping myself centered and trying not to freak out when things that really aren't important go awry. There is so much tragedy and all around suckiness in the the world that I just hug my baby tight and remember what's important.
2) People are crazy. Terrorist attacks in Mumbai? How is there this kind of hate in the world? The Governor of Illinois? What the hell is going on that people like him exist? Please explain.
3) On a brighter (and tastier) note, my husband and stepson made the yummiest cake ever the other night that of course I vowed I wouldn't eat (just a taste) and I'm inhaling it. It's also not processed and even good for you!
check it out: www. naturallynora.com
4) Please watch Biography Channel tomorrow night at 9pm for my company's kick-ass documentary "Homeward Bound: John Mellencamp." It is awesome and we worked really hard on it.
So a few things on my mind. None particularly funny. Sorry - I promise to be funnier soon.
1) Perspective is my word of the month. Keeping myself centered and trying not to freak out when things that really aren't important go awry. There is so much tragedy and all around suckiness in the the world that I just hug my baby tight and remember what's important.
2) People are crazy. Terrorist attacks in Mumbai? How is there this kind of hate in the world? The Governor of Illinois? What the hell is going on that people like him exist? Please explain.
3) On a brighter (and tastier) note, my husband and stepson made the yummiest cake ever the other night that of course I vowed I wouldn't eat (just a taste) and I'm inhaling it. It's also not processed and even good for you!
check it out: www. naturallynora.com
4) Please watch Biography Channel tomorrow night at 9pm for my company's kick-ass documentary "Homeward Bound: John Mellencamp." It is awesome and we worked really hard on it.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Miracles do Happen!!!!!
No I didn't make a new friend at the playground but I watched history unfold before my (bleary) eyes last night and I am in disbelief. BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA is our next President!! I have never been more proud of our country. I have never felt more optimistic and relieved. I have no cynicism today - just unadulterated joy at this moment. It's about time.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Mean Girls
I have a good friend who also happens to be an incredible singer/songwriter:
www.jonathabrooke.com. (Please become a fan immediately - she is best thing to ever happen to the music world and it's a sin that stupid girls like Katie Perry are famous with one song and Jonatha has been creating amazing music since the 80's and still is not a household name).
Anyway, when Jonatha was growing up, she was of the "no boob" persuasion and the girls who had boobs spoke a secret language called "titty talk" which girls with no boobs couldn't understand. Here theory is that we are all basically the same people we were at 13 year old. I don't think she's wrong. Those titty talk girls are now all grown up and wreaking havoc at the playground.
Proof is in the video. I was in Columbus, IN a few weeks ago for work (not glamorous, but gotta say I stayed at the most beautiful hotel in the middle of nowhere Hotel Indigo www.ichotelsgroup.com). I had on the most ridiculous morning show known to man - "The Mike and Juliet Show." Not surprising that these idiots are on Fox. So the Regis and Kelly wannabes had a whole segment on the MOMFIA (love then name) - which is basically what I've been talking about - except this is like my experiences on crack: http://www.mandjshow.com/videos/momfia-madness-continued/.
My takeaway? If I look like that desperate Mom on the tape then kill me now and the moms I've met at the playground seem like saints compared to the bitches that were beating up on this pathetic soul.
Please tell me there's a middle ground!
www.jonathabrooke.com. (Please become a fan immediately - she is best thing to ever happen to the music world and it's a sin that stupid girls like Katie Perry are famous with one song and Jonatha has been creating amazing music since the 80's and still is not a household name).
Anyway, when Jonatha was growing up, she was of the "no boob" persuasion and the girls who had boobs spoke a secret language called "titty talk" which girls with no boobs couldn't understand. Here theory is that we are all basically the same people we were at 13 year old. I don't think she's wrong. Those titty talk girls are now all grown up and wreaking havoc at the playground.
Proof is in the video. I was in Columbus, IN a few weeks ago for work (not glamorous, but gotta say I stayed at the most beautiful hotel in the middle of nowhere Hotel Indigo www.ichotelsgroup.com). I had on the most ridiculous morning show known to man - "The Mike and Juliet Show." Not surprising that these idiots are on Fox. So the Regis and Kelly wannabes had a whole segment on the MOMFIA (love then name) - which is basically what I've been talking about - except this is like my experiences on crack: http://www.mandjshow.com/videos/momfia-madness-continued/.
My takeaway? If I look like that desperate Mom on the tape then kill me now and the moms I've met at the playground seem like saints compared to the bitches that were beating up on this pathetic soul.
Please tell me there's a middle ground!
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Maybe It’s Me
My husband thinks I might be giving off the wrong vibe since people are nice to him and not to me. Since he has lived here a long time (10 years with his first wife, 2 with me), he finds people in our fair suburb generally very friendly. Or at least he thought that until we went to the playground together as a family today. Me, hubby, younger stepson and the baby.
Before we even settle into our swing routine, my daughter spots an adorable white fluffy dog sitting next to the slides. Since she lives for dogs and I feel guilty that we’re never going to get her one (I am only having one kid so she will pay attention to me and not some dog when we’re at home, got it?), I always bring her over to the dog so she can pet it, lick it and generally just spaz out. I gingerly approach the very attractive woman on the bench who is talking to the semi-attractive guy next to her. It’s clear from their body language and stilted conversation about which synagogues they like that they are not a couple.
Me: Excuse me, do you mind if my daughter pets your dog? She loves dogs.
I’m sure she can barely hear me over the freakout sounds of my baby.
Pretty Dog Owner Woman: Oh, yeah – ok.
The dog proceeds to lick my daughter’s face off and my daughter proceeds to laugh and sing and make very cute excited noises. You would think that might elicit a glance (just a glance, mind you) from the pretty dog owner woman and the guy on the bench, but they don’t look down once or stop their conversation for a second.
So while I sit beneath the bench facilitating the lickathon, I am registering the shock that these 2 people have not once looked down to see what all the raucous is about. Finally, I feel we’ve overstayed our welcome (not that they’ve noticed) and I get up to leave.
Me: Thank you. The dog’s beautiful. What kind is it?
Pretty Dog Owner Woman: A Cockapoo?
Me: Oh she’s so cute.
Pretty Woman gives me a fake smile. I take my cue and move on.
For record, I am not a super-hot Mom with a super hot body who would threaten most women I come into contact with. I am attractive but could certainly lose a few lbs (even beyond the remaining baby weight). I am blessed with good skin which makes me look younger than my almost 39 years. But let’s face it: every woman at the playground is younger than me anyway – even the ones with 8 and 9 year olds! All this is to say that on the surface, I can’t possibly be a threat to these women. And unlike Kate Winslet’s character in “Little Children,” I am not some bohemian loner who looks like I’d rather have my head stuck in a book (or an oven), instead of conversing with the other Mommies.
We all end up on the swings with a seemingly nice attractive blonde woman pushing her very cute 18 month old daughter. I carry my daughter to the swing and my husband pushes her.
Blonde Woman: How old is she?
Me: Just about a year.
Blonde Woman: She’s not walking yet?
Nothing pisses me off more than questions like this. I mean besides my own insecurity that my baby has not arrived early to a single milestone, it’s just plain rude to make someone feel bad about something that shouldn’t even be happening yet!!
This obviously doesn’t go unnoticed by my husband either who is both very funny and very competitive like me.
Husband: She's not walking but the thing that has really surprised us is her fluent Spanish.
To her credit, Blonde Woman laughs and it seems genuine although I don’t think she realizes it’s mainly at her expense.
At this point, I’ve already decided Blonde Woman will not be a new friend, so I let my husband talk to her while I coach the ‘take the socks off the baby while she’s swinging game’ between daughter and stepson. It’s actually really fun and helps drown out the conversation between Husband and Blonde Woman.
As we leave the playground, I silently vow not to badmouth anyone and see what my husband has to say. His first words:
“That woman was a bragger. Kinda weird too.”
Phew. So maybe it’s not just me.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Am I a snob or are they?
So I decided to start this blog as an experiment. I've lived in my leafy little suburb outside Philly for 2 years now and despite my winning personality, good sense of humor and very cute kid, I have yet to make a single friend in the neighborhood. Instead of taking this personally or as a reflection on what's wrong with me, I choose to blame the (mostly) awful (mostly) women I meet every time I walk my daughter to our local playground.
Here's what happened today.
The playground is packed. A nice fall day around 5pm and I can barely get a spot on the swing. I pick the last one and I push my daughter while the two fairly attractive and very fit women next to me do not acknowledge my existence and proceed to talk about their activities.
Lady #1: We're doing Sally's Music class and my older one is in pre-school 5 days a week.
Lady #2: Oh - we're only doing pre-school 2 days a week.
While the 2 women are talking, Lady #1's twins (about a year old) are on the swing and she has her back to them. The girl is sitting in the non-moving swing looking like she just smoked a joint and her twin brother is being pushed by his 3 year old sister who is also bouncing a ball in his face. The mother has no clue. She hasn't turned around once in 10 minutes.
Lady #2: I want to start storytime with Joseph because I'm worried he's not verbal enough and I want him to start making more sounds (Joseph is sitting in the baby bjorn on her chest -he is 6 months old).
Lady #1's cellphone rings. It's about the 10th time it's rang since I've been standing there. She hangs up, proceeds to whip around to me - me who has now been standing there a foot away from them pushing my daughter for about 15 minutes :
Lady #1: I know you. How do I know you?"
Me: (She looks familiar to me too but I really don't want to admit it) Um, maybe Sally's music class?
Lady #1: Yes but I see you everywhere. How old is your daughter?
Me: (tries to talk but is interrupted by Lady#1's cellphone ringing. Once she hangs up she turns back around to her friend and they continue to talk -- Lady #1's back is once again turned to her kids and of course to me.
Eventually I take my daughter out of the swing and Lady #2 leaves. Lady #1 notices us again sitting on the end of the slide.
Lady #1L "When do you do Sally's music class?"
Me: Saturday mornings.
Lady #1: What else?
Me: What else?
Lady #1: Yeah, what else do you guys do? Storytime, Gymboree?
Me: Oh - I work - so music class is about all we can fit in.
Lady #1: (very quickly answers) Yeah, I used to work too. (cellphone rings. She talks -ignoring children once again. She hangs up and hightails it out of there, never looking back to say goodbye).
So there you go. This was my lovely time at the playground today which unfortunately is emblematic of how it usually goes - although most of the time I am only overhearing these conversations, not participating in them.
If you are one of the women who identifies with "Lady #1" then you will hate me and my blog and hopefully I won't bump into you at the playground. If you do, please don't throw my daughter of the swing. She can't walk yet.
The truth is, I'm not really looking to find a deep connection or soulmate - just someone who doesn't disgust me or make me nauseous. Before you start getting all Mommy Wars on me, please understand this has nothing to do with me being a working Mom and looking down on stay at home Mom's. I truly respect and admire stay at home Mom's. Hey - some of my best friends are SAHM's! This has to do with me not understanding why I can't relate to these other Mom's who, on the surface, I should have plenty in common with. Yet I walk away from the playground always feeling lonely and lost.
Just so we're clear, I am not a snob who expects these women to be talking about the election or how we've just entered another Great Depression. But I become Greatly Depressed and isolated when I feel like Mommy cliques are all over the place and my best girlfriend is my NPR podcasts that I listen to on my walks (btw - I didn't say the NPR thing to be snobby or try to sound intellectual - I love Us Magazine and Perez Hilton just as much but they don't have podcasts yet).
So the experiment is two-fold. I'm gonna give myself 6 months to try and make an actual friend at the playground. And in the process, I'm going to fancy myself somewhat of a suburban anthropologist to find out what it is that these "soccer Mom's" talk about when they think no one is listening (ok - obviously I am listening but since they're ignoring me it really doesn't matter, does it?).
Tell me all your tales from the playground. Maybe it will make me feel better... or maybe worse.
Here's what happened today.
The playground is packed. A nice fall day around 5pm and I can barely get a spot on the swing. I pick the last one and I push my daughter while the two fairly attractive and very fit women next to me do not acknowledge my existence and proceed to talk about their activities.
Lady #1: We're doing Sally's Music class and my older one is in pre-school 5 days a week.
Lady #2: Oh - we're only doing pre-school 2 days a week.
While the 2 women are talking, Lady #1's twins (about a year old) are on the swing and she has her back to them. The girl is sitting in the non-moving swing looking like she just smoked a joint and her twin brother is being pushed by his 3 year old sister who is also bouncing a ball in his face. The mother has no clue. She hasn't turned around once in 10 minutes.
Lady #2: I want to start storytime with Joseph because I'm worried he's not verbal enough and I want him to start making more sounds (Joseph is sitting in the baby bjorn on her chest -he is 6 months old).
Lady #1's cellphone rings. It's about the 10th time it's rang since I've been standing there. She hangs up, proceeds to whip around to me - me who has now been standing there a foot away from them pushing my daughter for about 15 minutes :
Lady #1: I know you. How do I know you?"
Me: (She looks familiar to me too but I really don't want to admit it) Um, maybe Sally's music class?
Lady #1: Yes but I see you everywhere. How old is your daughter?
Me: (tries to talk but is interrupted by Lady#1's cellphone ringing. Once she hangs up she turns back around to her friend and they continue to talk -- Lady #1's back is once again turned to her kids and of course to me.
Eventually I take my daughter out of the swing and Lady #2 leaves. Lady #1 notices us again sitting on the end of the slide.
Lady #1L "When do you do Sally's music class?"
Me: Saturday mornings.
Lady #1: What else?
Me: What else?
Lady #1: Yeah, what else do you guys do? Storytime, Gymboree?
Me: Oh - I work - so music class is about all we can fit in.
Lady #1: (very quickly answers) Yeah, I used to work too. (cellphone rings. She talks -ignoring children once again. She hangs up and hightails it out of there, never looking back to say goodbye).
So there you go. This was my lovely time at the playground today which unfortunately is emblematic of how it usually goes - although most of the time I am only overhearing these conversations, not participating in them.
If you are one of the women who identifies with "Lady #1" then you will hate me and my blog and hopefully I won't bump into you at the playground. If you do, please don't throw my daughter of the swing. She can't walk yet.
The truth is, I'm not really looking to find a deep connection or soulmate - just someone who doesn't disgust me or make me nauseous. Before you start getting all Mommy Wars on me, please understand this has nothing to do with me being a working Mom and looking down on stay at home Mom's. I truly respect and admire stay at home Mom's. Hey - some of my best friends are SAHM's! This has to do with me not understanding why I can't relate to these other Mom's who, on the surface, I should have plenty in common with. Yet I walk away from the playground always feeling lonely and lost.
Just so we're clear, I am not a snob who expects these women to be talking about the election or how we've just entered another Great Depression. But I become Greatly Depressed and isolated when I feel like Mommy cliques are all over the place and my best girlfriend is my NPR podcasts that I listen to on my walks (btw - I didn't say the NPR thing to be snobby or try to sound intellectual - I love Us Magazine and Perez Hilton just as much but they don't have podcasts yet).
So the experiment is two-fold. I'm gonna give myself 6 months to try and make an actual friend at the playground. And in the process, I'm going to fancy myself somewhat of a suburban anthropologist to find out what it is that these "soccer Mom's" talk about when they think no one is listening (ok - obviously I am listening but since they're ignoring me it really doesn't matter, does it?).
Tell me all your tales from the playground. Maybe it will make me feel better... or maybe worse.
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